Seriously A.D.D.

   I know I haven't blogged in a while, and usually I would write some amazingly profound bit of wisdom for you all but I don't have any of those right now, so here's a picture of a cat:

   Yeah, that's nice. If we're going to be completely honest here, I have to admit that at least 50% of my thoughts are about funny cats. Anyway... I have lots of random thoughts everyday that I've been wanting to share and now I can. So here's a few:

-During the elections I found a quote that went something like this, "While everyone is getting into violent political debates on Facebook, I'm over here like 'Hey! More cat photos!' "

-Every time I dance in an empty aisle at the store, I look to a security camera and point while I dance, almost to say ''This one is for you!"

-When people cut me off mid-sentence, I find myself not listening to them. In fact, in my head I see myself throwing a chair at their face. Then I laugh and people slowly move away from me because I'm crazy.

-Sometimes I blurt out things that should have stayed in my head and then I look around and say "What, who said that?!" .... Probably doesn't help with the crazy thing does it?

-My driving test is coming soon and my fear for the behind the wheel portion of the test is hitting a pedestrian  or running over a mailbox.

-The online driver's ed course inserts random, superimposed cartoon animals to pictures of intersections. They have no purpose whatsoever.

-When people ask me what I do with my free time now that I'm homeschooling, the only images that come to mind are cats saying "I does nuffing. I is cat." That's because I do nuffing. I is lauren.

-And when I see scantily clad women on T.V. or inappropriate girls anywhere, I think to myself, "I bet her dad cries at night." or "I bet her parents never talk about how happy they are on her life choices."

-If Jesus saw what Easter and Christmas look like now, he would probably be super confused on who that fat dude is and why that bunny runs around with a basket full of cavities.

-Is anyone else unsure of when Halloween became "Dress-like-a-hussy-ween" ?

-Usually when people cough/sneeze/throw their germs in the air, I ask them to "please die quietly". Most of them don't know it's a joke.

-I jumped out at someone once and the puddle on the floor around them told me that maybe I shouldn't surprise people who are on the way to the restroom...

-In parking lots, when I see carts that aren't put in the cart return, I get really frustrated. And when people justify their leaving the carts out with "well isn't that the cart person's job?" or "I didn't feel like taking it there" it's even more angering. That's like going to a restaurant and pouring ketchup right on the table next to your plate and saying "I didn't feel like putting it on the plate" or "well isn't it the busboy's job to clean up after me?"

-Do bananas say banono to drugs?

-Why is it that the only people who we want to sell us things (girl scouts, obviously... they have thin-mints) actually obey the "No Soliciting" sign?

-A security camera sales man came to our door, completely disregarding our lovely sign asking for "NO SOLICITING" told us he wasn't selling knives, he was "just trying to protect our neighborhood." As we closed the door on him, I thought to myself, "Wave goodbye to our cameras!" He must have been blind or illiterate. My bet is both.

- When I cross streets, I look out for cars that might hit me. In my head, if I see a car coming at me, I can just throw something at the car and it will obviously stop the car from hitting me. Duh.

-"I'll only lay in bed for like 5 more seconds," I lie every morning.

-If people don't like my hair cut, I'll just casually bring up the fact that I donated 13 inches of hair to Locks of Love. That'll shut 'em up.

-Pallet expanders should really be named "Flavor Savers." For those of you who have been so blessed as to have escaped orthodontics, eating with one of those shoved onto the roof of your mouth = food saved for later.

-I named my refrigerator Bessy, because she's white, and gives me milk, just like a cow.

-Christmas means "Buddy the Elf, what's your favorite color?"

-My excuse for buying tons of random crud at the store that I don't need is "well, I was gonna just buy this one, but when I picked it up, I saw it's shelf buddy and realized that I was tearing it away from its friends, and family! 'Take us all,' they screamed. So I answered their cries. 'Of course I need five of the same tea cups,' I answered. 'Of course.' "

-Today I found a book called "Awkward Family Photos" and it's filled with exactly what it advertises. Must admit, I was so glad that I wasn't in there.

-We think there is an owl living in the tree in my front yard. I now tell people that I have a pet owl. When I explain the situation, and they try to tell me that I don't "actually" have an owl, I tell them, "you're actually just jealous that I have an owl and you don't."

-"Did you get a haircut?" "Nope, a robber broke in during the night and stole my hair. And added layers. And highlights."

-My grandparents got me a car and when they showed me the HUGE trunk, my first thought was "oh cool, it's big enough to stash my bodies!" I didn't say that out loud, but I wish I had. The look on my grandparents' faces would've been awesome.

   Well I'm hungry and tired now. Aaaaand yeah. I hope you have a beautiful rest of your day or night :)

-Lo

In Mysterious Ways

   Everything was gone. Just gone. I walked into my room in horror, seeing everything on the floor and finding things broken. My jewelry box was empty and my guitar missing. "Why is this happening, Lord?" I kept screaming, "why?" They had taken things of sentimental value and things that were irreplaceable. Not only that but they had taken our spare keys, jeopardizing our safety and making things utterly worse.

   A few days ago, my mom picked me up from school and asked me if I was hungry or if I wanted to go home and stop at Panera on the way to church later. "Let's go to Panera right now!" I said, so we went and had our lovely lunch/dinner and went on our way back home. As we walked up to the house, my mom put her key into the lock of the security door and when it didn't make the clicking sound we had become accustomed to, we realized the door was unlocked. My heart sunk when the second door was also unlocked. "We've been broken into," my mom said. I went numb. As we discovered more and more missing, I felt so angry. My tears of sadness and frustration, turned to sobs of anger and a longing for revenge. It took me a little while to realize something; I was doing exactly the opposite of what the Lord asks us to do on a daily basis. Only one verse kept coming to mind, Romans 12:19 "Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: 'it is mine to avenge; I will re-pay,' says the Lord." Even though all I wanted to do was find the little turds who robbed me and make them feel as badly as I felt, I had to understand that's not my job. Being angry wasn't going to hurt the burglars, it was only going to hurt myself.

   The next wave of pain was asking God why He would do this to me, why did He do this to me? Again, it was brought to my attention that God did not do this to me. He did not just decide, "Hey, today I'm going to send thieves into Lauren's house." No, He didn't do that. However he did allow it to happen. You know how after something tragic happens to you and everyone just keeps telling you, "don't worry, everything happens for a reason!" and all you want to do is punch them and say,"yep, there's definitely a reason I just knocked your teeth out." Well, they're not wrong, they may be a little bit annoying, but not wrong. You see, God lets everything happen for a reason, even though it doesn't always seem like it. Another verse was pointed out to me. Deuteronomy 29:29 "The secret things belong to the Lord our God, but the things revealed belong to us and to our children forever, that we may follow all the words of this law." God has revealed so much about Himself to us on a daily basis, but sometimes, there are things that He feels we would be better off not knowing. This is one of those times that the Lord will most likely keep a secret but that's ok, because at least He is apart of it and working in us. And even though He hasn't revealed everything to us, He has revealed enough to us so that we can find comfort and peace in Him. 

   I also can't help but feeling like the Lord and His divine intervention had saved my mother, brother, father and I from making sure that none of us were home. It was my brothers day off of work but he decided to go out for the afternoon, my father was at work, and my mother and I were at Panera. If any of us had come home while they were still in the house, which I'm sure they were when my mom picked me up from school and asked if I wanted to go home or to Panera, they would've most likely acted rashly, and one of my family members might not be here today. We all blame ourselves but I feel like the Lord keeps telling me that this happened for a reason and He needed to protect us in different ways. The Lord truly does work in mysterious ways.

   Matthew 6:19-21 "Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." I found this verse way to close to home for me. God's not saying that we shouldn't  have material possessions or that we shouldn't feel sad when those things are taken from us. No, He is saying that the things of this Earth won't matter once we are in heaven. He's saying that we should focus more on Him and how we can further His kingdom, rather than how much we can own on this Earth. Yes, it hurts when precious items of this Earth are taken from us, but we have to remember that we couldn't take it with us anyway. So we can mourn the loss but we must move on and ask the Lord, "What's next in your plan for me? What do you need me to do for you and your Kingdom?" We must remember what's important, and that's our faith in our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ and bringing others to His saving grace. This is hopefully as close as we will get to Hell and if we can get through this with our faith intact, we can spend eternity with our Savior in heaven.

Letters and Kony2012

   I would hope that by now, you understand who Joseph Kony is, however if you haven't heard, please watch this video: www.kony2012.com

   This video left me speechless. How is that for 26 years this has been going on and no one here seemed to know? I mean this is insane what Kony is doing. I started to liken him to Hitler, but it was brought to my attention, that this man is almost worse, because these are his own people he's killing and he has no purpose other than to maintain power. What's even worse than that? He's using their children to fight a war they don't believe in. Being a teenage girl, this is even more horrifying to know that there are girls in central Africa that are the same age as me, and younger, being raped because of Kony. And these Invisible Children are being used to kill there friends and families.

   For all those who are saying, "Everyone keeps jumping on this bandwagon.." I would like to say, this is a "bandwagon". This is raising awarness for a country that has no one to help them and awareness of the monster that is doing this to them. Look at it this way, you're an 8 year old child, and one night while you're sleeping, you're kidnapped right out of your bed then forced to kill your own parents. Not so funny now, is it? That scenario I just described, is very real, and has been going on for over 2 decades.

   Now that it's in the light and that everyone knows, we need to do something about it. We can't turn our backs on something like this. Knowing that this is real and that children are being murdered and no one is helping them is unsettling to me. So let's change that. Now, I know that because we're broke teenagers that not all of us can afford to give money, but you can absolutley still help! Write a letter, make some phone calls, spread awareness! I wrote a letter to my Representative (Darrell Issa) letting him know that we care and we are crying out to help those people in central Africa. It is attributed to Gandhi that he said, "Be the change you want to see in the world." I take that quote to heart.

   One last thing, for Cover the Night  on April 20th, we need to remember something. We are fighting for peace, so while your plastering Kony's face everywhere, try to do it peacefully. I mean try not to damage property or cause chaos, because no one will take us seriously if they think we just want to vandalize. We need funding to go toward capturing Kony, not cleaning up our mess. So please, be peaceful about it.

My Sister

  

   There's a person in my life who most would say is my best friend but that's not true. I say that's not true because she's so much more, she's my sister. Ok, so she's not my biological sister but she's close enough. When I first met her, she seemed super intimidating in her softball uniform, her "death stare"(which I later found out is just her zone out face) and she's gorgeous, which for girls, means she's a threat. But one day at church I made some really lame joke with her around and she was the only one who laughed, so I had to friend her. Obviously. I got to know this "intimidating" girl and I realized that I was completely wong.

   In 6th grade, we went to winter camp where we were thrown into the same room and got to know eachother a little bit better. A few weeks later at church, she ran over to me, gave me a hug, and said, "I'm so glad you're here! I was hoping you would be!" Now, I realize that she probably just said that because I was her only friend in the room, but I don't care, because we became really close friends after that. By the beginning of 7th grade, we were best friends.

   We had many adventures from then on: once we went to a student leadership retreat where we slept in the same sleeping bag because we were terrified of bugs, animals and crazy ax murders. I'm pretty sure we only got 3 hours of sleep that night. Another time, we were in big bear and we got to share a room in the hostile we stayed at. While we were there, we went to big bear lake, made a make-shift fishing pole, and tried to catch fish that were apparently too smart for us. We've done a billion other things together that include, camps, whitewater rafting, nerf gun wars that she wins and I almost win, birthdays, being ninjas, church, ihop, and just being around eachother, because that's all we need to have fun: we just have to be together.

   My sister is the most amazing friend a girl could ask for. She listens to me when I'm angry, sad, or just so loopy that shes the only one who understands what I'm saying. Through thick and thin, she's always there for me, and I thank the Lord for her every chance I get. Beth, if you're reading this, I just want to say, thank you for everything you do for me and that I could never let you go, because you know too much about me. ;) I love you, Pooper Scooper!

I don't like to call it stalking...

   Humans are very interesting creatures. When I'm in a public place, I've found that I tend to stare at people. It's not a concious decision, it just kinda happens. Usually, they don't notice but when they do, they tend smile nervously, then a scared expression takes over that smile, then they fastly walk away. All this usually takes place before I've realized what has just happened. It's not stalking, it's observaton. See, I can learn a lot about people by watching what they do in their daily life and their relationships with people. I don't follow them around or learn where they live or anything creepy, I just watch. It's not stalking.

   Sometimes, I'll be with people and just awkwardly stop talking because I've noticed someone to start observing. It's pretty funny when I do, because sometimes I will have been in the middle of talking when I just stop because the A.D.D. has gotten the better of me. It annoys my friends so badly, but I blame it on defective Adderall.

   Then there's facebook. Now, that is stalking. But I'm not entirely sure that it wasn't invented to train stalkers. I mean come on, it's just too easy. It should honestly be called futurestalkersofamerica.com. You know it's true, and you that you're a facebook stalker. Don't deny it. And don't become a real stalker.... Now, have fun on stalkerbook!

-Lo

"Some call it stalking, I call it 'Love'"

What's my name again?

   Lauren. That's my birth-name which is virtually un-used. Once, I tried to count every nickname I had ever been called, and you know what I found? I had lost count. Lauren is the name my mother calls me when I say something that should've stayed in my head and the name people who have just met me call me. Yes, some friends call me Lauren but most call me Lo, Spaz, Lolo, Loey, Pooh Bear, etc. You see, all of the names have different meanings to me and memories brought to mind. I may not remember every nickname but I remember the meanings behind them.  Most people don't like nicknames but I think they're sweet. They're ways of people telling me they love me, which i find reasuring.



   I love giving nicknames as much as I do recieving them. Jake became Jakes because of a typo, Kayley became Special K because, well she's definetly interesting, and Beth became Pooper Scooper and Wa(phlem)-La(phlem) because she and I have a very strange relationship... Anyway, every nickname given has a special memory to go with it and a relationship that is strengthened. I love all of my nicknames no matter which one it is because it tells something about who I am and the relationships I have.

   I told my Uncle Danny (not my real uncle, but he acts like one) that he had never called me Lauren and in response to this, that's all he would call me. No more Lo, only Lauren, which you would think wouldn't annoy me but truth is, I had grown found of him calling me Lo! I even missed it! That's when I truly understood why I liked nicknames, because Lauren is so formal.... Lo is my name, It's comfortable, and lets me know I'm loved. That's why I am ok with my gajilliontrillion names. I love them.

Names of Lauren:
Lo
Georgie
George
Loey
Lolo
Spaz
Dump Truck
Pooh Bear
Lori
Laren
Pooh-ella
Punkin
lanh
Lovie
La-izzle Blue
It
Laurens
...... I'm just gonna stop here because frankly, there's not enough time. So until next time.
-Lo

Ramblings from defective Adderall

   Life with A.D.D. is always interesting. My friends say it gives me character but I think it's annoying. I'll be taking a test then I look out the window and notice a squirrel. It's all over then, because all I notice in the world is this little woodland creature. It's like, "Oh hey Lo! I know you've studied for this test a long time but I'm gonna mess with you and make sure you fail 'cause you're only focusing on my awesome squirrelness!" and I'm like, "No squirrel! I shall not give into your cute trickery!" Then I've wasted 10 minutes arguing with a squirrel that is looking through a trashcan for food and everyone else around is asking if I'm feeling alright because my ramblings were sadly not contained to my head.
   But A.D.D. isn't always bad. I mean, it gives life a fun and strange twist because I think about the most random things. I'll be talking with my friends then all of the sudden I have changed the topic because I've noticed or remembered something I think is funny. This happens daily.

Mama: "What movie do you wanna watch Loey? We could watch Moneyball again!"
 Lo: "oh yeah! I love that movie!"
 Mama: "I know right?! Lets wa-"
 Lo: "I NEED ICE CREAM NOW, MOM."

My mom laughs but I can't help just saying what's on my mind! It's those random blurts that gave me the nickname Spaz. Oh well, no matter what I do, I can't stop being me and I like who I am, A.D.D. and all.  "You see it as A.D.D. but I see it as Random Multitasking!"
-Lo